The method

The Six

Six sessions over about three months. Here is every one of them, before you pay me anything. You should know exactly what you're buying.

Each session has one focus, one thing to work on before the next one, and one way to tell whether it moved. The six are the same for every man; what goes inside them is whatever you walked in carrying — a death, a marriage, a job, a calling, a father. We meet every other week, so there's room to do the work in between. Fifty minutes, video or phone.

  1. What you're actually carrying

    The whole inventory, said out loud, probably for the first time. Not the tidy version you give at church — the anger, the resentment, the fear, the part you've never told anyone.

    You leave with → it named, and one goal for three months from now. Before next time → write the sentence you never say.

  2. What it's doing to your body

    Sleep, temper, the tight chest, the checked-out stare, whatever you reach for at ten at night. What pain does to a man's body is not weakness and it is not sin. I found that out about myself late.

    You leave with → one honest look, and your goals in writing. Before next time → change one thing, not five.

  3. The person closest to you

    Usually your wife. She handles it differently and you've read that as coldness, or she's read your silence as not caring. Two people in the same house, missing each other completely.

    You leave with → the conversation you've been avoiding. Before next time → have it.

  4. Who's watching you

    Your kids. Your younger brother. The men you lead. What they're learning about being a man from watching you handle this — and the father you're still carrying, whether he's gone or just never said it.

    You leave with → one thing you'll say to them. Before next time → say it.

  5. Your faith, honestly

    Lament is in the Bible for a reason. Romans 5:3–4 doesn't skip the suffering, it goes straight through it. Where believing and knowing came apart for you, and how they come back together.

    You leave with → permission to say the hard thing to God. Before next time → say it.

  6. How you keep going

    The written plan for your next ninety days. Your rhythms, the two men you call, the warning signs you now recognize, and what you do on the days that will always be hard — the anniversary, the empty chair, the date on the calendar you can't get around.

    You leave with → a plan on paper. Before next time → send it to someone who'll ask.

What you decide, you write down

Nothing here stays as a feeling we talked about. Every session ends with something decided and written — a goal, a conversation, one change. By session two it's a page in your own words, in your inbox. By session six it's a ninety-day plan you keep using after we stop meeting.

How it works

From first call to finished

  1. A free call

    Thirty minutes. What you're carrying, what you want different in three months, and whether I'm the right person for it.

  2. You start the Six

    $540, or three payments of $180. If money is what's stopping you, say so.

  3. We work the six

    Every other week. Your goals in writing after session two, so this stays honest for both of us.

  4. You keep going, or you don't

    You can stop with the plan in hand, or move to twice a month. Stopping is a finish line, not a failure.

Book a free 30-minute call See what it costs

Come ready to name one thing you want to be different three months from now.

Also available

The men's grief group — four weeks

Six to eight men, ninety minutes a week for four weeks, same men every week. Some men would rather not be the only one in the room. There's something that happens when a man hears another man say the thing he thought only he was thinking.

$180 for the four weeks. Groups start when four men have signed up, and the first call is still free before you join one.

Premarital coaching for couples

Before the wedding, the two of you decide the things most couples find out the hard way later — money, family, conflict, faith, expectations — and you write them down. Four sessions together, $400.

We work from the SYMBIS assessment — Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts. You each answer it separately, and it comes back as a report on the two of you together: where you match, where you don't, and the conversations worth having before the wedding rather than after. I'm a certified SYMBIS facilitator, so the report isn't something you read alone — we go through it. Book a call and say it's premarital.